my LOVE - challenged

[ Disclaimer: This post is simply a result of some heart reflecting and does not have to do with anyone directly in our lives.  In plainer words: no, no one has been mean to us. ]

This year Chris and I have probably gone to church less than either of us ever have in both of our lives combined.   When we have gone to church we have even been asked if we are attending somewhere else.

"Why?" -  you ask, maybe even slightly shocked.

Mostly because a lot of our friends have gotten married this year and one of us was usually in the wedding party.   Weddings these days require a whole weekend and usually several before hand.    We have been super blessed by these weddings.   We have been even more blessed to see our friends enter amazing marriages.   The big cherry on top of the all that is having more married couples to live life with.

Not attending a whole lot of community based worship had done three things to me.   The first being that I am required to have Holy Spirit quiet times by myself.   Quiet times have become more valuable because I have to seek the Lord myself and hear from Him myself or I will be completely empty.   I have learned that in order to do that I have to be completely open and humble before God - which is really really hard to do.   Secondly I have realized that I really really miss church and I cannot wait to get back involved and attend regularly.

Finally - I have begun to question some of my Christian based and culturally acceptable beliefs and actions.   You see I grew up in Church and in a Christian family.   I went to elementary in the early 90's.   I am a product of focus on on family parenting.  

I was taught in more ways than not to separate myself from the sins of this world.  Which is a good thing for sure.   But was I also taught to judge the sins of this world?  

Never before in my life have I ever been so challenged to love the sick and hurting of this world.   Never before in my life have I ever felt such compassion for those who do not know the true depth of Jesus's love for them.   I have not (at least up until this moment of my life) ever been called to love the sick and dying of Africa, India, or Haiti.    I have always always seen the sick and dying closest to me and felt the most for them.   The ones in the poor neighborhoods that I occasionally drive by, or the ones I shop next to in the grocery store.  I always think of the ones who might be in sexual slavery in the very city I live in.   While this has been a huge awakening in me this year and I am still trying to work out how to love the orphaned poor here in Houston - something else has also caught my heart.

It is this:  that we as American Christians are some of the most judgmental people on planet earth.   Myself being the chief "judger" of them all.   I started asking myself: Am I condemning more than I am loving?  Am I more quick to call a Christian brother or sister out than to give them an encouraging word?  Am I more quick to judge their actions than to try and understand their motivations?

Unfortunately the answer to most of these questions was yes.

The root cause of most of these terrible characteristics in me was pride and fear.   My own pride and fear came out of believing in too small of a Jesus.   A Jesus whose love was not big enough to cover my own inability and the inability of others.   Thankfully my desperate quiet times yielded some good wisdom and love from Jesus who showed himself to be so much bigger and more capable than my human heart could imagine.

I have realized that my form of Christian love was so mean, so I had to change it out for a God kind of love that is beyond human understanding.   This is no small or easy thing because it sometimes requires you to love even when you don't want to or even when you do not understand.

As Chris and I have grown up more this year we have encountered more circumstances that require more of this kind of love.  

There are two specific categories where my love has had to grow:

1.  People who knowingly sin and suffer the consequences and still need to be loved.
- Yes it might be their fault they are in the mess they are in, but I am not called to judge them.   I am called to love them.   If they ask for advice I can give it, but I am not called to condemn them.    I am defined by Jesus who loves me so much he gave His life for me.    Jesus never shunned these people.   Jesus showed more love than the culture of the time had ever seen.    The Church should be defined as such -- showing more love than the world has ever seen.   Yet, the church is made up of people.

2. Christians who condemn others way more than they offer love.
- This is really where I get in trouble.   My self-righteous flesh wants to go into butt kicking mode.  There is quite possibly no one or nothing more mean in the world than a condemning Christian.   A condemning Christian is afraid of sin and has too small of a view of God.   A condemning Christian believes one must outlaw sin instead of receiving the grace to overcome sin.   A condemning Christian lives by the law of legalism instead of the law of grace.   Yet, a condemning Christian needs my love just as much as any other person does.   When it comes down to it I am not called to condemn the condemning Christian EITHER - I am called to walk in God's empowering grace and love them TOO.

Man --- growing up in HARD.  Kicking butt seems to be a lot easier :)

In essence this challenge to love is really all about faith.   Do you believe God is big enough to cover all?   Do you believe God is big enough to cover all the sin in the world and of the church?  Do you believe God is big enough to cover differences in different theologies?  Do you believe God is big enough to love all of who you are?

Faith comes by hearing the word of God or reading the word of God and acting out what it says.   God never lets you down which why we build up our faith.

It is possible that Chris and I have some condemning Christians in our life.   It is my challenge to show love to them in the hope that they see a much bigger God.

I feel this is a better option than a Jess ready to kick butt?  I know my husband would agree, and probably my would Dad too.

So what does this have to do with not attending very much church?  Being a little more outside of the church I have seen a little more what the church looks like (sometimes) to the outside world.    I want the church to be a place where every sinner feels free to go.   The church should be a place where every unmarried pregnant mother to be feels safe.   A place where every divorcee finds peace.   The Church as a whole should be so much more loving than the world.   There are some churches that do this and there are some that don't.   Unfortunately the world sees more of the churches and Christians who don't.

We must have a balance between  encouraging people to live a grace filled life so they do not sin and accepting and loving those who do sin.   While also calling out those in the church who refuge to stop sinning.    While the perfect balance of these things seem impossible I believe it can be found in Jesus.

A Christmas Blend

A List:
1. We are drinking Starbucks Christmas blend coffee right now.  It is amazingly smooth and delicious.  After you have tried many coffees you realize that some are good and some are amazingly drinkable.  The Christmas Blend is amazingly drinkable.   You will quickly find yourself pouring a second cup.

2.  We had Christmas in Magnolia this year.   It was fantabulous.   One thing Christmas reminds me of on my side of the family is the severe shortage of girls.   My Mom's brother's kids consist of 3 boys and a girl, and my Dad's brother's kids consist of 3 boys and girl.   I also have three little brothers.  

3.  We spent Christmas Eve with my Mom's side of the family.   Our tradition is to open one gift an hour until they are all un wrapped.   In between each unwrapping we fill ourselves with all the wonderful food that continually comes out of the kitchen.   We end the day with a vigorous round of Christmas bingo.    Chris and I dominated again this year, but in true oldest child fashion gave one of our gifts to one of the younger kids.

4. Chris and I laid in bed Christmas Eve night and read the Christmas story to each other.  This made me miss the Hill side of the family's special Christmas Eve tradition of reading the Christmas story as an entire extended family.

5.  Christmas morning is spent with the just my immediate family.   This year I made Pioneer Woman's cinnamon rolls and a special batch of gluten free rolls for my brother.   I love this morning every year.   We only let one person open one gift at a time to stretch it out as long as possible and to see what everyone got.   The sibling love gets better every year.   My brother's girlfriend got the boys nerf guns.   Needless to say a huge nerf war quickly ensued.

6.  We spend Christmas afternoon with my Dad's side of the family.   I love this time because it is always super chilled.   When we gather with this side of the family the testosterone levels always rise to incredible heights as we have 7 boys ranging from 15-26 all in the same room.   My only girl cousin and I always manage to find a spot away from all the manliness.

7. We are leaving this Saturday to drive to the Diamond H ranch in Childress, TX to spend Christmas with Chris's family.   I cannot wait to drink coffee on the couch with my Mother in Law (love) :)

8.  I am babysitting my brothers great dane for a couple of days.    Jack The Great Dane is my Giada's best friend in the whole world.  She is completely in love with him and cannot be reasoned with in any way when he is here.  Jack on the other hand is in love with Luke (my brother) and mopes around and cries when separated from him.  

9. This Friday we have our last wedding of 2010.  We will have officially attended 12 weddings this year.  Chris being in at least 4 and I in one.

10.  The weekend before Christmas was my birthday.  Which was spent attending one graduation and two weddings.   Chris still managed to squeeze in a cupcake party for me :)

Thou Mayest

Remember this past summer when I decided to read East of Eden by John Steinbeck?

Several of our friends LOVE this book.  It took me about two months to read this book because it is dense, man!  It is jammed packed full of humanity making good and bad decisions and all the suspense that goes a long with that.

Once I finished the book I could not figure out why so many people loved the book.   It was sad.  It made people look sad.   It had that whole Lord of the Flies thing happening where you finished the book questioning if you were inherently evil or inherently good.  

The entire point of the book just straight up hit me in the face several months after I finished reading it.

The point is this:  In the book Lee discusses the verse in Genesis where God is responding to Cain after God rejects his sacrifice but accepts Able's.  Genesis 4:6-7  So the LORD said to Cain, “Why are you angry? And why has your countenance fallen? ⁷ If you do well, will you not be accepted? And if you do not do well, sin lies at the door. And its desire is for you, but you should rule over it.”    


Steinbeck figures out, after talking to some Jewish Rabbi, the Hebrew meaning for the word "should".  The word is timshel and basically means "thou mayest".   The last phrase in verse 7 means "thou mayest rule over it".   Steinbeck implies in the book that this verse in Genesis means we have free will choice over sin - even though sins desire is for us.

[ Please make note this is Steinbeck's rendering of a Jewish Rabbi's understanding of Hebrew ]

Nevertheless, the point Steinbeck is making is awesome and terrible at the same time.   God gave us free will to either choose good or choose evil.   Which means when we stand before God one day we will be judged for the CHOICES we make.   We will not be judged for the choices other people make or how their choices affected us.   We will be judged for how we CHOOSE to react to the CHOICES other people make.

You might be wondering why this applicable to my life right now?  It is always applicable to my life at every moment, but I have been considering it more this morning.   Do you remember me telling you that when I was a freshman in college that God spoke the words Vulnerably Dependent to me?   I have come to realize that vulnerably dependent means that you choose to be dependent on God and not on yourself or other people.   In theory this makes a lot of sense and in practice this a very hard thing to do.

I think God takes us through various levels of dependence on Him as we grow to trust Him more.   Meaning that one person's dependence on God can look very different from another person's dependence on God at any given time.

This past weekend I was talking to one of my single girlfriends who bravely came to the Lone Star Marina's Christmas party called Sausage Fest.   We make Sausage.  At this party it is safe to say that about 98% of the people are married, engaged, or seriously dating.   So my friend coming and enjoying herself is a big deal.   One of the first things I learned to do after God started speaking to me about being Vulnerably Dependent was to fall completely in love with Him.   Instead of freaking out about fearing that I would never get married, or getting over some boy, or dating some boy - God let me choose to fall head over heels in love with Him.   In doing so I learned to trust God with all the desires of my heart regarding marriage.

I told my friend that this is the secret to finding the person that God has for you.   I told her that the most attractive thing you can do is to choose to fall in love with Jesus, and that as you do that a beauty will be released in you that is unparalleled on this earth.  

These days my version of being Vulnerably Dependent is trusting that God will qualify me to do what He is calling me to do.   God has called me to write.  I am pretty sure it is safe to say that nothing has ever terrified me more than being calling to write.   In learning to be dependent on God in this area of my life I am learning what true humility really looks like.   Without Jesus speaking through me my words really and truly do not mean that much.

I am trying to tell you this morning that I am in one of those moments between choices.   I am either going to choose to obey God and sit down at my computer and allow him to write through me, or I am going to figure out every single other way to fill my time and never find time to write.

I want to choose to write.  I just have to decide that I will no matter what I feel like doing.  It is my choice and I want to steward my free will to the best of my ability.

What choices are facing you today?  Do you trust God enough to choose the best choice He has for you?

He just walked right on in.

I am sitting here on my couch with coffee and small puppy (though not quite that small anymore :) ) beside me, and I am an extremely happy camper.

You see, here's the thing, I love being right here.  Ok, I love drinking coffee with the puppy, but more than that, I love writing.  For the last two months or so we were in the barn I had the worst case of writer's block.  I would want to write, but simply had nothing that pulled me into writing.  (That was very strange and frankly awful for me.)

Now we are moved into our first home, and the transformation has been fairly amazing in my life.  I now drive a scant 11 mins and 30 seconds into work instead of 45 minutes on a good day.  HEB, Costco, Freebirds, Five Guys, and Lowe's are all within 5 minutes of the house.  I can see friends any night of the week that we want to without having to drive an hour.  It is so wonderful, such a blessing from the Lord, and my heart is happy here with my small wifey (Who is currently sleeping in the other room still.  She is a super cute sleeper.).  

So lately, I find myself with another sort of conundrum.  I drive to and from work or to run and errand for said small wife, and I keep getting flooded with things to write about.  Good?  Yes, absolutely.  Bad also.  Why?  Because I'm in the car with no "writing" option.  

Summary of this thought: I have got to find a way to record these ideas for future scribbling because Jesus put this writing bug in my heart.  Whether done poorly or well at this point, it is something that I love to do and something that God continues to draw up.

So, without further adue, I have a very firm recommendation for each and every one of you out there who likes good music.

Wes, Sheridan, Jess, and I all went to the Needtobreathe show at House of Blues (great venue btw) the other night expecting to see a great show from them.  Luke Friesen's little bro, Toby, is currently playing keys and a little guitar for them, and they went even harder than we had expected them to.  Expectations surpassed.  Well done, gents, and your heart matches.  Too fun.

What we did not expect:

The Daylights

Opened for NTB.  I was floored.  They were good.  Huge sound for a three piece gig.  

Then all of the sudden they play this song called Weapons (on myspace page).  

I have no explanation for what happened at that point, but all I know is that out of the clear blue I felt God's presence just walk into the room.  It was marked, and it was unmistakable.  (Also rather fantastic.  I mean, how cool is Jesus?  "Yea, sure, let me waltz into this House of Blues bar and show up at a concert that is not branded as 'Christian'.")  For the record, He stayed the rest of the show through NTB. It was so much fun to worship to Something Beautiful with my hands held high.

I know this:  When a band is good, and God's hand is on them like that, they are someone worth getting behind.

Summary of band/concert thoughts: If you trust me or Wesley Charles Whitney at all about bands, buy The Daylights CD on iTunes or Amazon, give it two spins, and you'll be hooked.  Great lyrics and a sound that is plum stuck in my head.

OK, I'm off to my favorite pastime - basketball.  Hope you laughed.

Mr. Hill

{Whatever you say I will do}

Ruth 3:1-5 AMP

1THEN NAOMI her mother-in-law said to Ruth, My daughter, shall I not seek rest or a home for you, that you may prosper?
2And now is not Boaz, with whose maidens you were, our relative? See, he is winnowing barley tonight at the threshing floor.

3Wash and anoint yourself therefore, and put on your best clothes and go down to the threshing floor, but do not make yourself known to the man until he has finished eating and drinking.

4But when he lies down, notice the place where he lies; then go and uncover his feet and lie down. And he will tell you what to do.

5And Ruth said to her, All that you say to me I will do.

Luke 1:35-38 AMP

35Then the angel said to her, The Holy Spirit will come upon you, and the power of the Most High will overshadow you [like a shining cloud]; and so the holy (pure, sinless) Thing (Offspring) which shall be born of you will be called the Son of God.(A)

36And listen! Your relative Elizabeth in her old age has also conceived a son, and this is now the sixth month with her who was called barren.

37For with God nothing is ever impossible and no word from God shall be without power or impossible of fulfillment.

38Then Mary said, Behold, I am the handmaiden of the Lord; let it be done to me according to what you have said. And the angel left her.

Today this is my theme.

Lord, all that you say to me I will do.

Is is scary, but I know it is the highest good.

She resisted a wild craving

Last night I wanted ice cream real bad.   The kind of real bad where you can imagine what it tastes like and you are imagining ordering lots of extra chocolate, caramel, and almonds on top.

Unfortunately I had not one single item in my house that even slightly resembled a dessert.  That is if you don't count the the organic cliff z bars for kids.

Even though Chris and I now live near civilization and could actually drive to Marble Slab and be back at the house in 20 minutes ---- I resisted.  I did not leave and go get ice cream at 8:30 at night.  

I just needed to let y'all know that I was a little proud of myself.  

But please --- give all the credit to my husband who convinced me that laying with him on the couch was way more satisfying than ice cream.  Also note that I am still thinking about the ice cream.

Decorating excitment

So I have a decorator.

I am really excited.  It is Liz from A Little Peace of Home and later on this afternoon we are going shopping at some of her favorite stores.  

She came over this previous Monday and we went room by room trying to capture a vision.   I love decorating but I feel completely lost while doing it.  I cannot tell you how awesome it is to have someone there with you who knows what you want to do and knows how to help you accomplish it.

Decorating is Liz's passion and you can tell because she is excellent at it and knowledge just seeps out of her.

The excitement cannot be contained!

P.S. Part two of the Addition Creates the Big Picture blog will be coming later on today!

Addition creates the big picture

Hi :)

It is finally cold here in Houston.  It rained for the first time in about six weeks and the rain brought the cold.   Houston's cold is unlike many places in the world.   Houston has humidity.  Humidity + cold = bone chilling.   A Houston 45 degree day with humidity is absolutely frigid - almost unbearable.   A Denver, Colorado 45 degree day is beautiful and requires only a long sleeve t-shirt.   Humidity --- it's a game changer.  Humidity, a small factor in the greater scheme of things, when added with several other elements completely changes the big picture.  It's the little things .....

I was talking with one my good friends this past weekend in Dallas about what it looks like to completely abandon oneself to God on a day to day basis.   She was asking and wondering, same as me, what that looked like and where are the women in this world that are good examples of this.   I was just as equally stumped as her as to how to answer this question.

In the past year or so I read Francine Rivers biography on her website.   In in she states the each of her books that she has written is her trying to figure out a question in her life.   The book is a result of her looking at all the possible answers and allowing God to guide her to something more concrete.   This little tidbit of information has kind of just living inside of me for awhile, and this week it came back to my mind.

The past three days have been somewhat of "doozies" for me and Chris.  I cannot go into all the details because some of the situations involve people other than me and Chris.   As I said in my last post we have recently just bought a house and are in the throws of putting it together.  The thing is we have only been in town one weekend since we moved in!  Since we moved into Houston, i.e. civilization, we have had the opportunity to hang out with lots of people that we usually do not get to see very often.   This is great and wonderful and everything I wanted - it is just my house and my life are not all wrapped up with pretty bows on them.  I still have boxes to unpack, mini blinds to hang, furniture to buy, closets to organize, grass to mow, and lots of things in the house to fix.   So take a new house that needs fixing, going out of town a ton +  not having a lot of alone time + lots of ends left untied + un-fun people situations and you get: A Chris and Jess duo who are tired and running a little emotionally thin.

The amazing thing is God has grown the two of us up enough to have peace in these "not so perfect" times which has been pretty mind opening.   I have realized that you can have trials in your life and still maintain peace, joy, and stability.   The way you do this is to lean on God everyday --- you decide to abandon yourself to Him on a moment by moment basis.

This morning I had just come to a place where I did not anything left inside of me to give.   I had a good cry and called my friend Julie and she prayed for me.   I then sat down with my bible and remembered what Francine Rivers had said in her biography --- that basically these great masterpiece novels that she has written are the result of her having unresolved questions in her life and her allowing God to answer them.  So I straight up asked God -- What does it look like to completely abandon myself to you, everyday?

For so long I wanted this answer to be one of those ground breaking, light bulb lighting, earth shattering realizations that completely change you instantly.   But, for some reason this morning I was ready to receive the completely normal and non-earth shattering answer God had for me.   It is this:  abandoning yourself to God everyday means that you choose God in every single situation.

 How do you do this practically? John gives a good description in 1 John 2:4-6 " If someone claims, "I know him well!" but doesn't keep his commandments, he's obviously a liar. His life doesn't match his words. But the one who keeps God's word is the person in whom we see God's mature love. This is the only way to be sure we're in God. Anyone who claims to be intimate with God ought to live the same kind of life Jesus lived" (The MSG).  The great big picture that we all see down the road, the big picture we are all aiming for, to get to the end of life and have God say "well done good and faithful servant" is made up of many little decisions that many times no one even knows about.   


Abandoning myself to God is a choice that I make each and every day.   It means that I read the bible whether I feel like it or not.   It means that I memorize scripture so that I have some good solid ground to stand on when my emotions start becoming a hurricane inside of me.   It means making decisions about how I am going to react to certain situations before they even happen.  It means having people people in my life that also live out God's word and can speak God's word into my life.  It means applying God's word to my life and not JUST reading it.


Practically and applicably (because I mean what's all this if it does not apply to the really really small things):
1. Choosing to get up early enough or making time at the end of the day to read the word 
2. Believing God's truth when the enemy starts lying to me about myself and my life.  Example: Two weeks ago we had a plumbing issue in our house and my thoughts started running wild.  Thoughts like: We chose the wrong house, nothing can go right, I am never going to get all the furniture I want, I am going to have poop floating down my hall way, I want to scream and cry and have a nervous breakdown.  As many of you girls know these thoughts happen a lightning speeds and your emotions quickly follow.  So in the course of about 20 seconds you are in the great blue funk and hysterical.   BUT - in that moment I CHOSE to not believe ANY of those thoughts and to take each thought captive into the obedience of Chris [2 Corinthians 10:5].  Guess what? I did not have a nervous breakdown and was calm and peaceful and absolutely everything with the plumbing was fixed about $45.
3. Disciplining myself to do things that my flesh absolutely does not want to do but is good for me like: getting enough sleep, eating right, exercising, having wise counsel around me, cleaning the house, being productive ......
4. Deciding to not compare myself to other people or care what they think.   I found that if I start caring what other people think about me and my life then I start isolating myself from people ... and that is not what I want.   I want to love people and people generally want some lovin! Practical application: Having people over at my new house when it is not decorated or something is broken and being confident about it and welcoming them into my home.  


It is when you start adding up all these small decisions that the big picture starts looking really great.  All of these small victories give us momentum for the really big decisions and situations in life.   This is not at all one those romantic truths that sounds good and you quote on facebook, but it is real and it works!  Do not receive these things in legalism like I most certainly would have several years ago.   Everything must be done out of love for and out of reverence of God.  When you do these things BECAUSE you love God and BECAUSE you want to know Him more and be more like Him is when these small battles reveal their great importance in your life!


"We pray that you'll have the strength to stick it out over the long haul—not the grim strength of gritting your teeth but the glory-strength God gives. It is strength that endures the unendurable and spills over into joy, thanking the Father who makes us strong enough to take part in everything bright and beautiful that he has for us." Collosians 1:12 The MSG


love the blog novel writer,

CHANGE --- that we love :)

Howdy y'all :)

Are you enjoying these October days?  I hope yours are filled with lots of pumpkin bread and changing leaves.  We are still enduring temperatures in the mid to upper eighties down here in Houston.    I am longing to wear my boots but it is just still too hot!

It has been since September 6 since I last updated you with my "thoughts".    This is because "life" has gotten in the way of me having too many "thoughts" so I shall give you an update of our "life" and maybe one day my "thoughts" will come back to the blog!

For your viewing pleasure....
The Hill House 2010 Event Calendar has looked a lot like this:

1. Hosted Matt and Lauren Sloan's engagement party and subsequent LSM New Year Barn retreat
2.  Joy and Eric getting married
3.  Houston Rodeo
4. Leaza and Jon getting married
5. Kyle and Jana getting married
6. Chris spraining his ankle and missing warrior dash which gave us a much coveted weekend at home
7. Natalie and Jonathan getting married
8.  Our two year wedding anniversary spent staying at the Westin Galleria, shopping, and eating.
9.  Chris having 200 bachelor parties to attend
10. Evan and Chris attending a Larry Titus men's retreat and getting their lives changed - while Julie and I hung out at the barn and bonded
11. Angela and Tommy getting married
12. Sheridan, Wes, Jana, & Kyle spending 4 days with us at the Barn for the 4 of July
13. Going to Dallas and staying at the Westin at the airport and hanging with Larry & Devi Titus
14. Michael Fermier and Danielle coming to stay the weekend
15.  Going to Boca Raton Florida with Chris's parents for a week --- spent getting massages, laying out, and eating
16. Lauren and Matt Sloan getting married
17.  LSM Men's Retreat --- Julie and I also hung out at the barn and did fun things around Houston
18. Daniel and Jenny getting married
19. Making an offer on a house in Houston
20.  Going on a cruise with 3 of our favorite couple friends
21. Going to Lubbock to see our friend Lauren and Jason's new baby
22. Coming back from Lubbock to find out that we will close TWO WEEKS EARLY on the House we had made the offer on
23. Packing and moving into a new HOUSE that we bought and love
24. Flying to Detroit where Chris got ordained and we did a little exploring
25. Chris's sister coming to stay with us at the new house
26. Realizing that we no longer live at the Barn and can see people during the week and stay up to 10:30 if we want to
27.  The plumbing system in our house backing up and Chris and Wes fixing it all by themselves!
28. Chris and Wes painting the house while Sheridan and I attended Alyssa and Austin's wedding!

I just felt like y'all needed to know what is going on in our lives so you can catch back up with me as I fill all of you in with my thoughts on all these crazy events in our lives!   We feel like in the last two months God has pushed the GO button in our lives.  After spending a quiet year in the barn this is a wonderful change.   A change that is happening very quickly.  

Events still on the calendar:
1. Jess and Mikala possibly starting a new business
2. Decorating my new house :)
3. Attending the Goodwins Halloween Party
4. Seeing Allie Maultsby and Charles get married in Dallas (and getting to see Shaina)
5. Celebrating Luke, Mikala, and Heritage getting their Aggie Rings
6. Thanksgiving
7. My parents' Christmas party
8. Sausage Fest
9. My birthday
10. Geoff and Erin get married
11. Laura and Tom get married
12. Christmas
13. Emily Staff and Jaime get married
14. New Years

WHEW :)  Now you are all caught and I can start blogging again and we can pick up where we left off! Which was the Fall TV schedule --- which in fact we have had absolutely NO TIME to maintain :)

Fall TV

It was not until I got married that I became a regular TV watcher.   During high school and college my schedule was constantly changing and I just simply did not watch a whole lot of TV.   In fact I really had no idea how other people watched so much TV.   Marriage and working does this whole number on the spontaneity of life which in return allows for regular TV watching.

There is also this weird honeymoon phase of marriage after your actual honeymoon where it is quite possibly the most romantic thing to sit on the couch together and watch TV and grow fat.    You just want to sit there with your honey and snuggle right in front of the Tube.   Everything else lessens in comparison to the complete joy it is to watch TV with your new spouse knowing that neither of you have to drive home after your show ends.    I think it is comparable to the first semester of college when you realize that your mom will not be waiting up for you in your dorm room, and the only things keeping you from not coming home at 4:00 in the morning is some sense of responsibility that she constantly tried to instill in you for 18 years.

All of this being said I am still somewhat ashamed of our TV schedule.  I used to make fun of people who categorized TV like this, but hey people change and now I am one of them!  This is more of wish list that really only Hulu and DVR can truly fulfill.   Here is what we in the Hill House like to watch on TV:

Please add in copious amounts of foodnetwork and the occasional 30 Rock!

Great kitchens :)

I love to cook.   This is not a secret.   Whenever I have any type of gathering in my kitchen I cook up a storm and force them to eat whether they want to or not.   This previous weekend we had 5 couples stay with us because of Daniel Weizel's wedding.   As soon as we walked into the door post wedding I adorned an apron and made two prosciutto pizzas.   Everyone thought I was working too hard but really I just could not give up the opportunity of having so many people gathered around in my house not eating!  So thank you everyone who I forced pizza upon at 12:15 in the morning!

I love to cook and I am SHORT - like 5'2 short.   When I found this kitchen below on one of my favorite blogs I want that kitchen I knew I just had to show y'all.  Below is a kitchen equipped with ladders.  It is a beautiful thing!  One day I would LOVE to have this kitchen.  Until then I will have to continue to ask my tall 6'4 husband to get things down for me that I cannot reach!

Me

Who I, Jessica Hill, want to be.

Me.   I want to be the me God designed me to be.   Unfortunately the only thing in the way is me.

I want to be a hot and sexy wife who loves, supports, and trusts her husband.  I want to be a fun and loving Mommy who is always there for her kids.   I want to be an inspiring writer whose only desire is to please Jesus.   I want to be an adventurous cook who feeds lots of family and friends.   I want to be healthy and fit.   I want to live the life God designed me to live.

God put me here on this earth so that I could know Him, bring Him glory, and serve His purposes.

El Yum: What to Eat?

Ever have trouble deciding what you want to eat for breakfast, lunch, or dinner?  Ever find your self going to the grocery store with out a plan, and then buying lots of food and then coming home and still not have anything to make for dinner?  Do you ever feel frustrated and wonder why in the world we have to eat anyways?

I have to admit that when I first got married I was totally overwhelmed with the whole cooking all the time and feeding a large man thing.   Sometimes today I get tired of cooking the same old thing and run out of inspiration to be creative, quick, and clean in the kitchen.   But living in the Barn out in Magnolia will cure you of this dreadful "What to Eat" disease pretty quick because if you have no dinner to make then well you may have to drive 45 minutes round trip to the nearest chick-fil-a.    My friends when you are so hungry that you are angry --- known as "hangry" --- then waiting 45 minutes to eat is a long time.  Especially if you have already wasted 1.5 hrs trying to come up with dinnerr at home!

When I first got married I worked a couple months at our "local" Anthropologie where I discovered this "What to Eat" meal planning pad for about $8.    This pad helped me to get inspired to plan my meals and write my grocery list down.   Mostly because it was from Anthro and it was cute!   It Turned out to a pretty good plan because it has been keeping me sane for about a year and half now.    I live by it!

On Sundays after church I sit down at our big kitchen table and take out my pad.    I first think of what our scheduled will be for the week and if I know we will eat out one day I go ahead and write that down.   I consult with the Hubby Bubby to see if he needs me to make him lunch all five days that week or just a few.   I then ask him if there is anything he wants me to make him for dinner that week, and usually he just tells me he loves everything I cook and he is positive I can come up with something.... ha!  After that I try and think of anything that I want for dinner off the top of my head and write that down.    Then I start recipe searching -  blogs, cookbooks, or inspiration from the foodnetwork or something yummy I ate at a restaurant the previous week.

I have found that some of the best recipes are the ones that you try and re-create from one of your favorite restaurant meals.

Once you have got all your meals down then it is time to check your fridge and pantry to see what you got before you make your grocery list.    I then flip over this piece of paper and make my list on the back of it.    I list what store I am going to and what I need from there along with any other "wifely" errands I might need to make that week.    That way everything I need to do is on that sheet of paper.

What I find MOST helpful with my little system is that by the time Wednesday has rolled around and I am exhausted or have had an extremely long hard day dinner has already been decided for me.    This greatly helps the "Oh I will just pick up take out on the way home" disease because everything you need to make for dinenr is already at home and in your fridge.    

Now for some recipes from around the Web that I love:

1. Mexican Hummus 

2. Chicken Pastina 

3. Black Bean Quinoa 

4. Southwest Chili with Corn (I use ground Turkey)

5. Chicken Pot Pie

6. BBQ Roasted Salmon

7. Anything from this blog  - They taught me to put pesto on Sandwiches ( can you say EL Yum? )

8. Cuban Braised Beef 

These are just a few to get your mind rolling.   Later on I will post everything I can think of to do with chicken!

Vulnerably Dependent: Simplified

My freshman year of college God dropped these two words into my heart during Breakaway.

Vulnerably Dependent.

You see I needed to break up with this boy and God wanted me to be Vulnerably Dependent on Him.  But I resisted and the consequences were not awesome.

Graciously Jesus still loved me even though I chose not to listen to Him.    Throughout the whole summer, after the break up and after I decided to pursue Jesus with all I had, God constantly kept those two words on my mind and heart.

Over the past 5 or 6 years God has taken lots of experiences in my life and used the term Vulnerably Dependent to help me understand them and help me to realize what he wanted from me.

Vulnerable Dependence on Him in every way of my life.

There is a huge obstacle that can keep you from being vulnerably dependent on Jesus.   Pride.

The scary thing about pride is that God resists the proud.   His spirit literally cannot be around pride.   Pride and God are like two ends of a magnet that repel each other.  The ugly thing about pride is that more often than not pride convinces you that you are in fact not proud.

You see I recently discovered that I had a whole lot of pride in my life.   I mean every single stinking area of my life.    You can see pride in your life if you feel like you have to promote yourself or protect yourself all the time.   We do those things basically because we believe that God is not good enough to do those things for us.  

Chris and I have been listening to these podcasts by Kevin Weaver and last week while I was riding in the car and listening to them I realized how much pride I have in my life.   I realized how this must be grieving God and causing Him to have to resist me in SO many areas of my life.   In a sweet and tender moment I repented and asked for forgiveness.   I submitted all my pride to Jesus.  It was an instant heart change.   My life has totally been different from that incredible moment.

I became Vulnerably Dependent believing God is good and that I can trust Him always.    It did not take some catastrophe or a huge amount of breaking for God to do this.   He gave me the opportunity and my heart responded and I instantly became a changed person while driving in the car.

God simply wants to be first in your life in absolutely every area.   He wants you to know that he is good enough to protect you, promote you, and know what is best for you.

El Yum: MMPs - Mustard Mashed Potatoes

Last night I did something epic.

On a whim and because I did not have any horseradish I put mustard into the mashed potatoes.

I had a craving for steak, so I marinated two big fat juicy new york strips.   I also happened to have some fingerling potatoes and some green beans.   I washed the fingerling potatoes and put them in water and boiled 'em up skin and everything.

For some reason I was craving horseradish yesterday, but there was none in a 15 mile radius around me so I had to come up with something.   Mustard was the something.

I added to my mashed fingerlings:

1 tbls of mustard (the grainy kind)

1/4 cup of sour cream

3-5 tbls of butter

1/3 cup of milk

salt and freshly ground pepper ( a lot)

2 dashes of garlic salt

The freshly ground pepper and the grainy mustard did something together.   Whatever it was, it was good.

The Barn, Chris & Jess, Friends, & Photography

Hi.

I used to take pictures.

At this present moment in my life I do not take pictures.

I would very much like to remedy this situation by doing two things.

1. Getting a camera that works well and takes good pictures.
2. Having one of my photographer friends teach me how to actually use the camera.

You see we have had lots of wonderful people over to the Barn these last few weeks and I have absolutely not one single picture to document the occasions!  Isn't that terrible?

We had Kyle and Jana over to spend the night several weeks ago.     Then the next night we made pizza for Silva and Stephen.    Then Wednesday through Monday Sheridan and Wes stayed with us and we cooked everything imaginable.    Then Saturday morning Kyle and Jana came and stayed with us until Monday.   Friday and Saturday I was also in Angela Mattix's gorgeous and fabulous wedding.   Sunday night Natalie and Jonathan had all six of us (Me, Chris, Sheridan, Wes, Kyle, and Jana) over for 4th July salmon, fireworks, and swimming.

All these amazing wonderful people.  All that amazing and wonderful food.   And not one single picture to document any of it.   SO much sadness.

We need to remedy this :)

What's the deal, man?

The deal, man, is this:  About 4 weeks ago I got a big spider bite on the back my leg, also known as the upper thigh.

This is what happened.   It was a Friday afternoon and I had gotten off work a little early.  Which is extremely typical in the oil business.   We were having Chelsea and Stephen Morris over for dinner and their pointer puppy Reese.   You see their pointer puppy is a 7th generation bird dog who comes from a long line of award winners.    This was a big deal you see because our mutt pointer puppy also wants to be a bird dog and I wanted both dogs to fetch stuffed birds out of the pond.

 I went to petsmart and bought two stuffed chickens suitable for water fetching.  I also bought some mosquito fogger at HEB because it is like the swamp land out in Magnolia right now and I knew if we wanted to spend anytime outside I needed to fog for mosquitoes.

Picture me in a purple sundress with a dish towel wrapped around my face fogging for mosquitoes around the pond.     I had full make up on and curled hair.    While I was fogging I was also picking up a few dog toys out in the front yard.   I picked up G's A&M Frisbee and found about 10 brown spiders underneath.   Normal people would be afraid and run away, but apparently I am not normal.    I absolutely HATE snakes, frogs, and lizards.    Spiders and bugs don't bother me too much, so I just sprayed them with the bug killer and stepped on a few with my Steve Madden sandal and moved on.

Apparently I messed with the wrong spiders because they decided to mess with me.     The scary thing about spiders is you do not know when they bite you.    When I got undressed for bed that night I noticed this huge whelp on the back of my leg, and I thought to myself man those mosquitoes are getting bigger by the year.    Thankfully I rubbed some tea tree oil on the back of my leg which I really think helped it from not taking over my entire leg.

The next morning Chris and I got up about 7:45 in the morning because I wanted to run.    I put on my running clothes and went down stairs to find Chris drinking coffee and having his quiet time.   By this time the back of my leg was hurting pretty badly and I had about a 5 inch by 3 inch bright red hard whelp which was surround by a massive pink circle that encompassed the entire back of my leg.

STILL I was unfazed.    I showed Chris, "Look, honey, at the back of my leg.   Don't you think that is cool?   Ok, I am going to go running now."

Chris:"What do you think happened, dear? "

Jess: "Well, it must be a spider bite.   I saw some brown spiders yesterday and I stepped on a couple and sprayed them with mosquito fogger.   I am going to go running now."

Chris: "Please go get in the car we are going to the emergency room."

Jess: "I really don't think that is necessary.  I will just rub some benadryl on it, and it will be fine.   I am going to go running now."

Chris: "Do you know what a brown recluse looks like?"

Jess: "No, I have never heard of one.  I am going to go running now".

Chris: "GET IN THE CAR."

Jess: "I have not had any coffee yet, we cannot go to the emergency room."

Chris calls his Dad and my Mom and determines that he is going to take me to my Dad's doctor in Tomball who happens to take walk-ins on Saturday morning.   Chris puts me in the car with my pink Nike mug full of coffee.

Jess:  "I am just going to go running real quick and then you can take me to all the emergency rooms you want to."

Chris's Dad had just sent him an email about brown recluses, so Chris was majorly concerned that I had got bitten by a big bad spider.   But he would not tell me what brown recluses did to you so I was completely clueless and was unconcerned.

We get to the doctor in Tomball and they take one look at my leg, which is throbbing and hurting really bad by this time, and send me straight back to see the doctor.

The doctor comes in and takes a good look at my upper thigh and says ....

Doctor: "If you had waited until Monday I would have had to put you in the hospital."

Jess: Blank Stare

Doctor: "You do not need surgery.   You do not need to get anything cut out.  You do not need to get anything drained.  But it looks at though you have a massive infection on the back of your leg.   We will never know what kind of spider bit you, although it does not look like a brown recluse because you still have the flesh on that back on your leg."

Jess: "Brown recluses take the flesh of your leg?"

Chris:  breathing deep sighs of relief and texting all family members and friends who are worried.

Doctor: "So I am going to give you two massive antibiotics, hydrocodine, and two ointments.  If your leg is still red on Monday then I will have to admit you to the hospital to put you on a drip."

Jess: "I hate antibiotics.  Is it absolutely necessary for me to take those?"

Doctor: "Well spiders tend to have nasty things in their mouth which apparently this spider transferred to you.    You are either fighting strep or staff, so it is really important that we kill the infection."

At this point I realized that this spider bite was a big deal and conceded that I would take the antibiotics.

Chris sweetly takes me to CVS and gets my prescriptions, then he takes me to the organic farmers market in Tomball, and then gets me Chick Fil A.  

I go home and take the antibiotics.   The antibiotics make me feel SO bad that all I can do is lay on the couch.    I could not work the first 3 days of that week and could only work half days the last two days of the week.   It was SUPER terrible.    But the antibiotics worked and the back of my leg is totally fine.


Needless to say the spider bite threw me off my game and blogging became the last thing that needed to be done.    So please forgive me.   I promise to catch y'all up on everything we have been doing these last few weeks.

What dreams are made of

Dreams are made up of amazingly designed and functional kitchens.   Kitchens that will house families.  Kitchens that inspire cooking.   Kitchens that keep families together.  Kitchens outfitted with the largest kitchen tables possible.   Forget that large dinning room table.   Put it in the kitchen.   Conversations will be started.  Lives will be changed.

I really like the idea of this kitchen:

I like this kitchen because it is organized functionally and not perfectly.   There is a MASSIVE difference.  Kitchens will stay clean if they are organized functionally, and cooking will be done with smiles and ease.    

I am not a perfectionist.   I am not an organizer.   I have fully embraced this about myself.   I always wanted to be one of those OCD perfectionist because everything they had and did was always so clean.  But as time told I realized that I was the opposite of this personality.   I like functional, comfortable, realistic organization.    

The kitchen pictured above is definitely not designed perfectly.   There needs to be some serious counter top space to the right and left of the gas stove.    But I love the feel of this kitchen.   Meals are made in this kitchen.  Family and friends gather and talk in this kitchen.

The wifie mama orchestrates the home from this kitchen.   It is awesome.   One day I will have my dream kitchen.  One day.

Love

Yesterday was our two year anniversary.   

We spent the weekend celebrating at the Westin Galleria Hotel.

On Friday night we ate at Star Pizza, and we watched Sherlock Holmes.

On Saturday morning we had french pressed coffee in bed.

We also celebrated at Nordstroms and J Crew.

( this was Chris's first shopping experience at Nordstroms, and his life is forever changed)

We laid out by the hotel pool.

We then ate at La Vista

I ate this:

And we drank this:

The we went back to the hotel and watched It's Complicated.

The next morning we slept late and drank more french pressed coffee in bed and had wonderful conversations about life.

We determined that year two of marriage brings with it a comfortableness with each other that year one simply does not have.   You simply trust one another so much more.

We then went and ate at Yao Ming's Chinese restaurant for lunch.

Chris wore this:

And I drank some of this:

All is all it was the most fantastic Houston weekend.   

It is amazing how you can spend the whole weekend with the person you are most in love with, and then still miss them when they go to work on Monday morning.

How I met Mr. Hill: Edition 3

I believe this weekend Mr. Hill will be giving his side of the story on how we met.   So stay tuned ....

I will continue with my side :)

As I remember we had this amazing conversation where I was rendered speechless and light headed and Lauren Lust had declared to the world that I would marry this man Chris Hill.

You see Lauren Lust, Wes Whitney, and Daniel Weizel all had this communication class together that particular semester.  It is also possible that the beautiful Sheridan Murphy also had that class with them.  Sheridan let me know if this was the same class!  I believe the very next day as I was getting off the bus on campus all three of them ran up to me, accosted me, and told me that I was going to marry Chris Hill.   Then they ran off and left me standing there bewildered and a little angry.

The next three weeks were all quite interesting.    Later on that same week Kristi and Lauren sabataged me at the Chi O house with Chris in tow.    I tried to act a little aloof but I was already totally smitten.   Chris and I began talking on instant messenger.   Yeah - we totally exchanged AOL im names.   My username shall remain a secret forever and ever.

Chris and I started talking via the computer and facebook and email.    Then I invited the entire Lone Star Verde over for Fratty Friends Friday at the sorority house.    This is week two after Chris and I had our three hour conversation.   We served pizza that Friday and it was a ton of fun.   Chris stayed after to talk to me as I was having a few problems with Mr. Boy from freshman year.

You see during this whole two week period of Chris and I recognizing that each other existed in the world.   Mr. Boy from freshman year had come back on the scene and thought that he wanted to date me again.    I was so very confused, and feeling lots of pressure to make a decision about which boy to choose.   This particular Friday marked the weekend before I was so to have FIVE tests the following week.    In fact ALL FIVE test fell on the Monday, Tuesday, and Wednesday of that next week.

I was feeling a little pressured by Mr. Boy and feeling TONS of pressure about my tests.    I sat Chris down in the sorority house and told him about all of my troubles.    He instinctively gave me some great advice about Mr. Boy.   Which of course I cannot remember.   He did not muddle or munipulate, he was just very honest and wise.   He was confident and not threatened at all by Mr. Boy.    This greatly attracted me to him.

Mr. Boy made several phone calls later on that afternoon as I was trying to study.   He very much felt that we needed to date again and was putting the pressure on me.    Chris being the studly man that he was sensed that I was under duress and made an executive decision.    He called me and said that I was to put on some super comfy clothes, gather up my books, and wait for him to pick me up.   He had cleared all non-studiers out of the Lonestar Verde, made coffee, and had even gotten some blue bell ice cream.

Chris came and picked me up and took me to his house to study.    Matt Sloan was there too and together the three of us studied in peace all night.   Chris protected and provided.   Mr. Boy was still calling and pressuring.

The next week I took my tests after being well studied thank to Mr. Hill.   But I was still confused about Mr. Boy.   Chris and I were definitely friends, and were definitely not dating yet.  I could tell that Chris was being supremely careful and cautious and was not about to make any sudden moves.

[  Little did I know that Chris Hill had taken Mr. Boy out to dinner DURING my accounting test and gave him a good talking to. ]

My Cowboy Daddy was drilling in Papau New Guinea at the time that all this was going down, so I was not able to talk to him much.    But I was in some desperate need of some good fatherly advice so I gave him a call and was able to get him on the phone.   I quickly explained the situation and he said one thing and hung up the phone.   He said "God leads and Satan pushes".

Instantly I knew what to do.   I called Mr. Boy up and set up a meeting in the park.   As we walked around the track I told him that it was time for me to be fought for, pursued, and cared about.   I put up that challenge and told him what I wanted.

After a summer of spending time with the Lord and talking to my Dad I suddently knew who I was and I  was no longer willing to compromise anything for that.   I wanted to present myself wholly in a relationship and not leave out the deep love I had for Jesus, or any of the opinions I had about life.

This definitely awoke something deep inside of Mr. Boy that I believe he had been searching for.   But, I had already made up my mind.   I told Mr. Boy that I did not want to date him, and that I just wanted to be friends with Chris Hill.

Mr. Boy was very confused.  FRIENDS?  I said yes, just friends.   Chris Hill had so intrigued me that I was content being just friends with him without any promise of a future.    God had stirred something deep inside of me and I was willing to risk my heart for Mr. Hill.   Mr. Boy was not happy about that at all.  Especially since when he and I had been dating the previous year he had confided in Chris about our relationship.   Chris had no idea who I was at the time.

After our conversation I went over to the Lone Star Verde with Kristi and Lauren.   Chris and his friend Brian Cooper had just gotten back from dancing at the Hall and were eating What A Burger (which I had always thought was Water Burger growing up).   Chris paid no attention to me at all.  This was mostly because his entire hosue of roommates had been pestering him that we were going to get married.

So I sat there on his couch, while he was ignoring me, thinking to myself "I have just sacrificed the relationship that I had wanted so badly for YOU."   I seriously think Chris said nothing to me that night.

More to be continued later on this weekend

Mr. Boy update:  later on that year God did some awesome and amazing things with Mr. Boy.   I believe he went on to meet his future wife that year.   They are happily married now and quite an amazing couple.

El Yum: Two Different Kinds of Pizza

Since I just posted the best pizza dough recipe I thought I would also tell y'all about the two different kinds of pizza we make in the Hill Household.

The first kind of pizza we make is just good old pepperoni.   Chris and I are pizza enthusiasts but we most love plain old pepperoni.    The foundation of a good pepperoni pizza is lots of sauce.   Of course this is all our  own opinion.   Pizza is very personal, so if you do not like lots of sauce then please do not be offended. BUT - before you totally make up your mind about that at least try lots of my favorite sauce.

I do not make my own sauce.  Praise the Lord.   But I absolutely love and adore and cherish Cento pizza sauce.   This can of sauce is on the pasta isle next to the expensive cans of special Italian tomatoes.   It is about $1.50 - $1.99 a can.   I promise that it totally makes the homemade pizza experience worth all the hard work.    If I were you I would just go ahead and pour that whole can of sauce on your pizza dough.

(Please note that this is not the fully prepared pizza sauce I love, this is just what a Cento can looks like.)

I have recently discovered that it is much better to grate your own mozzarella.    It melts so much better.
Cover your pizza in a good amount of mozzarella and then any of the following toppings: Hormel natural and uncured pepperonis,  mushrooms, banana peppers, turkey Italian sausage, bell peppers, black olives, or Roma tomatoes.   Sometimes Chris and I just do pepperoni and sometimes we get a little more creative.   Seriously y'all pizza is about the dough and the sauce.

The next pizza is Margarita pizza courtesy of my friend Elizabeth Meeh.   She made this pizza for Lauren and Matt's couples shower that she so wonderfully hosted.   Of course I spied something wonderful being made and paid close attention.  

All you need for this is:
Homemade pizza dough
Pesto
Fresh mozzarella sliced thinly
3-4 Roma tomatoes
A dash or two of garlic salt

Liz spread the pesto over the dough.   I would say a good 1/2 a cup to 2/3 a cup depending on how much you think you want, or how large you have rolled your dough out.   She then covered the pizza in the sliced mozzarella and then covered it in the sliced Roma tomatoes.    Then she lightly lightly sprinkled the top with garlic salt and brushed some olive oil on the crust.    I bake this pizz in a 450 degree oven for about 15 minutes.   I promise you will not burn the cheese.

Then prepare yourself for some amazing awesomeness.   This is truly an amazing recipe.   Chris, my meat eating husband,  absolutely LOVES LOVES LOVES this pizza.

There you have it.   Two great pizza recipes to spoil your loved ones with.   A homemade pizza and some good beer or wine while watching a movie = a great "Art of Staying In" date which was coined by the one and only Julie Prothro.

El Yum: The Best Pizza Dough

Tonight I am making pizza with some of my high school, and now real life, besties.

I made 3 balls of pizza dough this morning.  Two for for the four of us, and one for Chris and his sister Heritage.

In the Hill House pizza is very much a nostalgic thing.   Pizza means romance, comfort, love, and is always the best conclusion to a long hard day at the office.    Ever since I got married I have been on a pizza mission.    A pizza mission to make the best homemade pizza.

I finally found the best pizza dough recipe, and I finally figured out the whole yeast thing!   I thought I would share since it only took me a year and half to figure it all out!

If I was super cool I would post pictures of the pizza dough making process.   But I am at work and access to pictures and a kitchens is limited --- even on my lunch break!

This recipe is from williams and sonoma where they also sell the best pizza stones.

Here's the deal though: I use the ingredients in this recipe but I do not follow the directions.

Here are the ingredients you need:

1. 2 tsp of active dry yeast, or 1 yeast packet.
2. 1 tsp of sugar
3. 1 cup of warm / hot water
4. 2 cups of bread flour
5. 1 1/2 tsp of fine salt (no kosher salt)
6. 1 tbs of olive oil

Turn your water facet on to hot and let the water run until the water is hot.   How hot you ask?   Hot enough that it stings your finger a little when you hold it under, but not so hot that you cannot hold your finger under.  In short not scalding but fairly hot.  In a large glass bowl pour in your yeast and sugar, the take a cup of the hot water and very slowly pour the water in.   Then take a small whisk and gently stir until all the yeast and sugar are dissolved.   Then leave the yeast, sugar, and water mixture alone for TEN minutes.    No longer and no less because during that TEN minutes the yeast will eat up the sugar and start to get frothy on top.   If no froth appears after ten minutes then you have killed your yeast and you will need to start over.    NOTE:  if you follow the water facet technique you should not kill your yeast, and you should be able to dissolve it.  It is a fine line folks!

After the ten minutes is over pour in your 2 cups of bread flour, then your 1 1/2 tsp of salt, and then the olive oil.    

The williams and sonoma recipe says to use your kitchen aid stand mixer with the bread hook attached.   But I have found that if you do this you tend to over knead the dough.   What I do is just mix everything in the glass bowl with a wooden spoon.   Stir until all the flour is mixed into the dough.   The dough will be fairly sticky, but that is exactly what is supposed to be.    Then lift your dough out of the bowl and pour another tablespoon of olive oil into the bowl.   Then cover then dough in the olive oil, and then cover the bowl with a clean dish towel.

It is important that you leave the dough in a warm a dark place.    Depending on how fluffy you want your pizza - let the dough rise for about 1-2 hours.   

If you would like your dough sooner than that --- heat up your toaster oven -- place a towel over the top of it --- and then place the bowl with the dough in it on top of that.    The dough will rise in about 45 minutes.

On a clean surface sprinkle a good handful of the bread flour and put your pizza dough on top.   Carefully coat the ball of dough and begin to knead for about 2 minutes.    Then roll your pizza dough out!

If you let the pizza dough rise for two hours then it will make two pizzas.  If you use the 45 minute method then you will be able to make one large pizza.

 ( Please excuse the weird formatting on this page.   I have no idea what is going on ).

The Free

Our friend, Kyle Wood's favorite book is East of Eden by John Steinbeck, and Jasmine Star just recently posted on her blog that she also loved the book.


I have kind of been starved for something a little more intellectually challenging to read than your average Christian novel.   Ya know, sometimes your mind just needs the exercise.   So, last week I walked in to Tomball's little used book store and picked up a brand new copy.


So far it is very interesting.   


As I read last night John transitioned in between story lines to make a little vignette about human kind, and it just captured me so I thought I would share:


"And this I believe: that the free, exploring mind of the individual human is the most valuable thing in the world.  And this I would fight for: the freedom of the mind to take any direction it wishes, undirected.  And this I must fight against: any idea, religion, or government which limits or destroys the individual.  This is what I am and what I am about.  I can understand why a system built on a pattern must try to destroy the free mind, for that is one thing which can by inspection destroy such a system.   Surely I can understand this, and I hate and I will fight against it to preserve the one thing that separates us from the uncreative beasts.  If the glory can be killed, we are lost."


On this memorial weekend where we remember and honor all those who have fought and died for this "free" country, I think this little vignette is especially appropriate.  It is the interesting thing about America that we fight for some sort of chaotic balance between the system and the individual.   It is the tension between the two that gives us momentum to continue to move forward, freely.   


It is also interesting to me that it is God who gave us our free mind and will, and because of that we are presented with the most valuable choice on earth.  To choose Him or not.


Happy Memorial Weedend, y'all!