A Tale of Two Weeks

I have become experientially convinced this week of something – prayer changes things.

Don’t get me wrong, I have experienced the power of prayer before in my life, but this week, the difference before and after was so extreme that it was frankly a lesson impossible to ignore and one that I will not soon forget.

For the first half of this week, I was very much not myself.  I was easily agitated.  I was at time bordering depressed.  I was so anxious about so many things.  The anxiety was the worst part.  I hardly know what anxiety feels like.  It is not something that I personally deal with on a daily basis (Though I understand many do, it just is something that the Lord had previously dealt with in my life.).

I was anxious and worried about everything.  Getting into another wreck, relationships, finances, stuff at work, my ankle – I mean, it was completely ridiculous.  I could not quit thinking about these things.  Worse yet, I could not quit thinking in an awful manner about these things.  My wife would’ve been the first to tell you that my attitude was horrific.

I kept thinking to myself, “What is wrong with me?  This is not like me.  I don’t struggle with this.  Why do I feel this way?  Why can I not get rid of these feelings, and where on earth are they coming from.”

That was about Saturday to Wednesday morning.  Since spraining my ankle, I had not had a very good quiet time up until Wednesday morning.  It was not an intentional thing, it’s just tough to get up and get going when you wake up to a throbbing ankle.

Wednesday I had, had enough.  I knew what I needed to do.  I got up.  I limped downstairs (not just physically).  I plopped on the couch.

I curled up and kneeled on my couch.  For the next twenty minutes I cried out to Jesus.  That was it.  I told Him how much I needed Him.  I humbled myself before Him.  On my knees, I made a statement of reminder to my Jesus, my flesh, and my enemy that I was submitted to my Master and at rest in Him.  Then I got up and went to work.

I cannot even begin to describe how categorically different I was the rest of the week.  It was astounding.  My attitude was altogether different.  Work was no less demanding, my ankle was still sprained, my truck was still in the shop; but my thinking and attitude was completely different.  I had joy in the midst of it.  I had peace.  I was able to give my wife the attention that she needed because I was no longer selfishly focused on my own anxieties when Christ has spoken so clearly for us to not be anxious.

He is a kind teacher.