You are moments away from reading The Top of The Hills very first guest blog.
I know, the suspense must simply be murderous at the moment, but I feel morally obligated to introduce the wonderful woman who will be our Inaugural Guest Blogger.
Patricia Cathcart is my Aunt. She is not only a woman that I respect a great deal for her keen intellect, her awesome work in the not-for-profit realm, and skills as a Grammarian (Aunt Pat definitely proofed about a ton of papers for Heritage and I growing up.), but a woman that I love a great deal as my dear "AP". She is my Dad's big sister, a mean Scrabble player, and a really cool woman if I may say so myself.
Her writing below is an excerpt from an email conversation that we had the other day - the subject of which should be fairly apparent from her response. I felt that I would be a complete fool to not share it with the rest of you, because it is funny, educational, and carries some excellent points on social commentary and manners. Enjoy!
"Since you asked, I will weigh in on the email thanks. I actually think its fine. This generation, your generation, is living life electronically in lots of ways. I can’t imagine that any of your friends or family would be offended that a thank you came via email. I was not. It is really the thought that counts. And email is fast and convenient and the way of the world. It allows us to keep up and stay in touch and requires so much less of us. There in lies the rub—it requires so much less of us. There are things that make me really sad about communication via email.
1) I can remember when I was in school, and even afterwards when I lived away from home as a newlywed, looking forward each day to opening the mail box. The great days were when there would be a letter from Grandmother Hill or Dorothy or a good friend from home, or a funny card—something other than a bill. Grandmother always put $5 in her letters and I always needed it! I guess now we look forward to reading our email, but somehow it’s not the same. When someone writes a letter there is a sense of preparation, of purpose, of thoughtfulness that is lost with an email. (Not criticizing you here, just commenting on the process.) You have to select the paper, the pen, find the address and a stamp, and put the finished project in the mail. With email, the preparation is lost.
2) As is the end product. I spent a couple of weeks at my cabin last summer and took the boxes your mom and dad had sealed up for me of the pictures and mementos that I had taken to the ranch for folks to look through. For some reason, there was a box of my personal mementos from junior high and high school. A trip down memory lane! In the box, along with dried corsages and dance cards (I’ll explain what those are if you don’t know!) and football ribbons, were some cards and letters I had saved. There were three or four letters from Grandmother Hill—one that had been sent to me on my birthday in Dallas. It was so dear. And at the bottom of the letter, baby brother Todd had scribbled his name and some other indecipherable words. I guess he had been with her and wanted to share in the task. There was also a telegram that Daddy had sent me on my 16th birthday when I was in Corpus Christi on a trip with the Rainbow Girls (I can explain that later, too!). It was a telegram, not in his own writing, and a poem, so probably not even his own words, but I had saved it because it was the only time he ever wrote me. There were also some old annuals with notes from friends telling me how much they loved me. I can’t even remember who some of them are now, but they wrote in my annual what a neat girl I was.
The point is, as I’m sure you can see by now, that you can keep a letter or a card if you want to, if for some reason it is special. The sentiment is no more real or heart-felt, but it is durable. It can be brought out years later and serve to remind us of things that are important in our lives—like your blog, only tangible evidence.
3) The worst part about email to me is the downward spiral that the writing skills of the next generation (my grandchildren) and those that follow are taking because of electronic communication. I was thrilled to see your blog and witness what excellent writers you and Jessica are. Texting (and I’ve climbed up on my soapbox now) is, in my opinion, going to be the downfall of written communication. I hope that there will still be English teachers that know enough and care enough to train students to write, and parents who know good grammar and insist on it from their children, but I’m really concerned. When u rite in text-speak and emoticons and u r not reading good literature and u r never seeing or using proper writing skills, how can u ever learn enuf proper English to pass it down to ur own kids? My grands are smart kiddos, but when I proof their papers I am genuinely appalled at how little they are being taught about the English language and what is being accepted as written work. When I see billboards and read newspapers and see magazine ads that misuse grammar and punctuation and incorrect spelling, I am appalled and saddened! The same people that scream that English is our native language and should be universally accepted as such need to get a grip and learn how to read, write and speak it or it will be gone in a heartbeat!
4) The final thing I will say is this (and probably what makes me the saddest). I think that it can be argued that cell phones and emailing and texting, with all their convenience, are, on a certain level, making us grow farther apart, not closer together. And good manners seem to have gone by the wayside. I see young mothers (my own girls included) talking on their cell phones while their children are in the car with them, texting in church or the movie or at the dinner table. (Cell phones ring at church, in the movie, at a funeral for God’s sake! This is certainly on my top ten list! Leave the dang thing in the car!) Can’t whatever it is wait a few minutes so that they can give undivided attention to their children—not to mention their driving! I was behind a woman in the grocery store the other day who talked on the phone the entire time she shopped and checked out, two children in the basket being totally ignored and wreaking havoc of which she seemed totally unaware. That’s just wrong on so many levels!
So, don’t get me wrong. I love my I-phone and my laptop. I am grateful for the convenience they provide and use them all day everyday. But when I have lunch with a friend or dinner with my family or sit in church or a movie or meeting, I turn them off. I try to “be here now in love” and give my love and attention to whatever I’m doing at the time. This is what I’m afraid is being lost.
Now, very little of that has to do with your question. Sorry I got so keyed up. The short, more acceptable answer is: “I think email thank yous are fine, even great! I just hope we don’t forget that once in a while, what we have to say may be important enough to write it down!
AP
PS. I was also thrilled to see that you keep m-w open. A dictionary is a great tool!
PPS. “Jessica’s and my blog” or “our blog”. No such word as “I’s”.
