Jason and Lauren are MARRIED

This past weekend Chris and I flew up to Lubbock to marry off Jason and Lauren.

Chris went to high school with both of them, and I immediately fell in love with both of them once I started dating Chris. That is of course after Lauren decided not to hate me and that I was in fact good enough to date Chris, but thankfully that did not take too long!

Weddings always remind me:
1. They are completely exhausting
2. Cost way too much - but who is ever going to change that :) ?
3. How creative and awesome God is, and how incredible marriage is underneath his covering and in his covenant!

This is one of those blogs that you could be totally vulnerable, gushy, honest, humble, romantic, and all that stuff. But, sometimes I think that somethings just need to be said without all the fluff and emotion in order for them to be received most effectively. Today I am probably going to talk to the women about being married, but all boys should read because it always helps to know the other side of the story.

Suggestion #1:

It is so important to realize that your man cannot satisfy you emotionally all the time. It is important to realize that all of your joy cannot be summed up in one person. It is important to realize that your stability and sanity cannot rely on just one person. It is important to realize the God must first satisfy all of these things first, and then your hubby (or wifey if you are a guy) can come in and just be the overflow of what God has already done for you. This solves the problem of what I call the black hole of need where you are constantly sucking the life out of your partner in order to be stable, happy, and fulfilled. I can promise you your husband or wife CANNOT fulfill you and is absolutely not supposed to. God is supposed to and is the only one who knows how to love you in the exact way you need.

When you are dependent on God for everything you are then able to operate as a fully functioning human being that actually can contribute to a marriage, a family, and society. Now - this is not easy and takes work, but it is absolutely necessary to be successful.

Secret # 1:

When you serve your spouse according to THEIR needs it will actually enable them to love you the way you need to be loved. It is one of those bible principles that is everlasting and surprisingly more simple than the world wants us to believe. It goes along with one of the golden rules: do unto others as you would have done unto you. So - that does not mean serve and love as YOU want to be served, but serve and love in the way that YOU know speaks most deeply to your spouse. I promise that once you two start this serving one another, or even trying to out serve one another the both of you will be so blessed you will not even know what to do. Once this is in play it makes sacrificing for each other a lot easier and even completely joyful!

Suggestion # 2:

This is really for the women - nagging your man is not the way to get things done or change him to be the man you know he is supposed to be. Only God can change people, so if there are things in your man that you know need to be changed then praying that God would either change him or you is absolutely the only way to change your man. As a woman God has given you a gift. That gift is the vision of who your man is supposed to be. You have two choices pertaining to the is gift: you can either nag him to death because he does not look like what you feel he is supposed to look like, or you can encourage him to be that man that God has shown you that he is supposed to be. Build him up - use your words wisely - let him know you think he is the king of the universe. Prayer and encouragement are the two keys to having the most incredibly loving and successful husband in the world. Nagging and tearing down are the two keys to castrating your husband in front of the whole world.


So that is my two cents for today - Chris and I are always learning together - so we always have something new to talk about - but that does not mean we are ever perfect!

Much LOVE to you all!