Love: It works

Last week I re-read 1 Corinthians 13.  Ya know, that love chapter that we never really understood as kids because it talked about clanging gongs and mirrors that reflected imperfectly!

While this is said often and it is definitely true: sometimes you can read something that you have read 20 times before and the 21'st time you finally get it.  I finally got 1 Corinthians 13 last week.  It finally resonated in me.  Not only the fact that God is love and love resonates from Him, but the fact that all love is seriously legit.  It is like the navy seal of characteristics.

4 Love endures long and is patient and kind; love never is envious nor boils over with jealousy, is not boastful or vainglorious, does not display itself haughtily.5  It is not conceited (arrogant and inflated with pride); it is not rude (unmannerly) and does not act unbecomingly. Love (God’s love in us) does not insist on its own rights or its own way, for it is not self-seeking; it is not touchy or fretful or resentful; it takes no account of the evil done to it [it pays no attention to a suffered wrong].6  It does not rejoice at injustice and unrighteousness, but rejoices when right and truth prevail.7  Love bears up under anything and everything that comes, is ever ready to believe the best of every person, its hopes are fadeless under all circumstances, and it endures everything [without weakening].8  Love never fails [never fades out or becomes obsolete or comes to an end]. 

I am at the same time in awe of the fact that God loves me and therefore feels all those things for me, and in awe that I fall so terribly short of that example.   I started to play out what love looks like in life and it was so different than what I thought.  

For example while trying to go to sleep one night last week I was thinking of something someone said that offended me slightly.  Awesome, right?  While I was thinking about this person and how I felt about them at that moment suddenly 1 Corinthians 13:7 came up in my mind and shouted "love is ever ready to believe the best of every person".  Like the snap of fingers my offense and bad feelings totally changed as I applied love to them.  I am terrible at believing the best of certain people.  No matter the reason that completely sucks and is not love.  But once I applied that definition of love in that certain situation and I allowed God to give me his love to love with - everything changed.  The premise that love conquers all started to really come alive as I realized how powerful love really is.

Recently I have been really intrigued by getting to know God for no other reason than just to have more intimacy with Him.   While this should be the goal of all our walks with God, for me it is just God getting me to the next level of maturity.  I have realized that God really is everything that we are searching for.   He creatively explains who He is all throughout scripture and somehow I have missed certain parts of Him while growing up.   

Isn't it cool to think that God is always ready to believe the best of us even when He knows our hearts?  

Today the part of love that I need to apply to life is: loves hopes are fadeless under all circumstances, and it endures everything [without weakening].  God is enduring.  His love for us is enduring.  His dreams for us are enduring.  His hope in us is enduring.  His love should translate into our life allowing us to have hopes that endure all circumstances.  Sometimes life can hand us some pretty crazy circumstances to endure through and enduring can be hard.  But we are loved by love himself who can hope for us and give us hope.  

The past six months have handed Chris and I a pretty awesome set of circumstances that have done their best to knock the wind out us.  Yet, God gently reminds us that he is love and love's hopes are fadeless and enduring all circumstances.  He is our provider and protector and our Daddy.  He is plain cool :)

Catching up On Life

Hi :)

Are you preparing for Christmas?  Are you getting excited to spend time with family and friends?  I know I am.  We are getting ready to celebrate our last Christmas without a child of our very own.  Can you believe that?

I am so excited.   I have moments where I begin to realize that our life is about to change big time.  I have other moments where I still cannot believe that I am almost 8 months pregnant.   Pregnancy has definitely forced me to focus on the present, so the moments when I am able to think about the future are always mind blowing!

I will be 8 months pregnant on Friday.  I am growing at alarming rates in every direction :) and I have something very alive inside of me moving all around.   The nursery is almost complete and I feel that we are almost prepared to have this little one.  At least we can get him home and provide him a place to sleep.  

To catch all of you up I have had a little drama in my pregnancy.  Which thankfully has not harmed or bothered our baby boy at all.  Our little one of growing and happy and being completed by God in my tummy.

My last post caught you up with my first trimester -- which was hormonally difficult but that is just sometimes the nature of pregnancy :)

[ Disclaimer: Talking about pregnancy drama that was supervised by doctors.  Please do not share with me any of your pregnancy related horror stories or any kidney infection horror stories.  Thank you ] 

A week into my second trimester I got a pregnancy induced kidney stone.  Under the care of doctors and nutritionists I was able to pass it at home.  Not without an excruciating amount of pain but also with some heart peace that I was going to be ok.

It took my pregnant body awhile to recover from that but the baby was fine and that was all that mattered.

A month after the first kidney stone my body threw me for a loop.  On the first Saturday of September, while Chris and I were watching Pioneer Woman on TV, I started getting symptoms of another kidney stone.  This time it was different and I knew that I needed to go to the hospital immediately.   Within an hour of the pain starting we were checked into the emergency room.  It was determined that I had a kidney infection and I was passing a kidney stone at the same time.   The pain was indescribable.   They eventually checked me into postpartum where I stayed for 5 days.   Thankfully the baby was completely un-bothered by the whole situation which I am so grateful to God for.  Thankfully I had some amazing doctors who encouraged me and spoke hope over me and the baby.  Thankfully I got better and was able to walk out of there.

Literally a week after I left the hospital I got another kidney stone.  Thankfully there was no infection or fever and the pain was not quite as severe.   I spent most of my time passing it at home but my doctor advised me to go see a urologist to see if he could help me out.   Unfortunately traveling while passing a kidney stone was not the best idea and the pain peaked right as I got to the doctor's office.  They immediately transferred me to postpartum care in the Labor and Delivery section under the care of my OB.   A beautiful lady came to transfer me.  She was dressed up in her business finest and did not look like someone who should be transferring a patient from one part of the hospital to another.   In the midst of the transfer while we were waiting on a room she prayed for me.  Instantly my pain stopped and I passed that kidney stone like it was no big deal and I got to leave the hospital the next morning.  Again, the baby was completely fine and had a great heartbeat and started to move.

The month after my kidney infection / second and third stone was emotionally very difficult for me.  I simply had no energy and had trouble accomplishing the most minuscule tasks.  For the first time in my entire life I experienced a little bout of depression.   In truth my body was recovering from a severe infection and was busy growing and protecting a little baby.   My body was tired and my emotions were allowed to run free and I was pretty angry that I had gotten sick.  After all I thought I was pretty healthy!

God did not let me stay there long, but I had to make the decision to stop feeling sorry for myself and gett off the couch even though I did not feel like it.   I was standing at the kitchen sink one day when the Lord whispered to my heart to fight.  To fight for my baby, for myself, and for my family.  I turned off the TV and started listening to sermons and my heart got stronger and stronger.   I was able to break out of the depression I was in and start to live again.

My doctor, who I LOVE, was finally able to get me on the right natural supplement.  My kidneys love it and everything is WAY better.   The baby has continued to grow and move and have awesome heartbeats.  

It has been a while since our last medical drama and I have energy and feel like a real human being. We even got to go on a babymoon to La Canterra resort just north of San Antonio and return to having a more normal social life.

I guess I tell you these things so you can be praying for us as we enter into our last few weeks of pregnancies.   As with all babies I know God has a special plan for our little boy.  I appreciate every prayer that comes our way.

I can say today that I feel God's presence in our life.  All of this has brought Chris and I closer together and has taught us to pray and be proactive.  God has given us what we need in this life we just have to receive it and sometime get up and fight.   God has allowed us to be SO EXCITED and to truly ENJOY all the non kidney related parts of this pregnancy.   God has even allowed me to be excited for our next pregnancy --- which I was totally unsure about when I was getting admitted to the emergency room.

Merry Christmas :)  I hope to keep you updated on our life, our thoughts, and what is going on in our hearts.